Question:



My best (and only true) friend is a pastor's son. However, he's very into alcohol and he's done drugs and he's definitely not a virgin. His family has no clue. The hardest thing is I'm very close with his sisters as well. Today the oldest sister read an email to him from some girl that said that the girl regrets having sex with him. Obviously, this was her first time hearing about this side of him. He truly is an amazing guy and has helped me in my darkest times and really helped me grow in my own relationship with God. How do I help her deal with this pain? And I feel like I need to talk to him, too. He's such a strong leader and I'm so afraid that this will taint what others see in him and be led astray.



Answer:



The first thing that you need to know about your guy friend is that he may have some good qualities, but he’s got some heart issues and probably needs to learn things the hard way. What he is meddling in is going to get out in the open. The Lord has a way of exposing what we try to keep secret. It would be for his benefit if you let him know that what he is doing goes against the Lord and His plan for his life. He may already know this, but hearing it from another believer puts it into a different light.

Bottom line with your friend is that you ultimately are not the one to help your friend. But you can be a great influence in letting her know you care for her, in praying that the Lord touch her heart, and in pointing to Him in your friendship. When I say you are limited in helping your friend, I mean that the Lord is the only one who can heal her heart from this hurt. I would suggest encouraging her to talk to an older godly believer about the situation and receive some godly perspective from a mature believer. If she tries to keep this to herself she will not heal properly. This may have been done in secrecy, but if she brings this into the light with the right people, she will heal.

Don't forget, if you have a question you can send it to me at asktheyouthpastor@xtrlive.com plus you can talk to us tonight at www.studenthopeline.com.